11.16.17

I lay my head down

In preparation for sleep


But I know it won’t be

A sleep so deep

That I won’t have a dream

Of you and me


And I’ll awake soon later

With cold hands and feet 

Because without you

I’m just not as warm 


I’m just not the same

Inside and out

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11.03.17 #2

It’s comfortable here,

In the lonely darkness.

A lone candle lit

Centered in the room.

A reminder of the light

That could be,

But never will

Because of me. 

11.03.17

Are you happy now? 

That you’ve convinced yourself

That to face agony alone

Is somehow noble of you


You won’t bother anyone

With your nonsensical suffering

Or your self belittling 

Or your torturous torment


You will carry your own weight

And not accept any help

You are alive. You are alone.

And it’s for the better


Besides…


They’d tell you to suck it up

If your pining were known

And you’d say thanks for your help

And continue to walk alone.

Rubatosis in Kenopsia (Heart Beats in Silence 08.28.12)

Thump, thump…
I’m here, I’m here,
But where is everyone else?
Thump, thump…
My heart beats alone,
Nervous, compulsive,
In a house where no one’s home.
Hello? Is anyone there?
No one answers,
Not even echoes in the air.
Thick layers of dust
Veil the furniture
Like an ugly bride,
Soon to be widow in which
No one takes pride.
Oh, Apollo, Aphrodite,
Arrive in time
And show me how to be.
The silence is coming,
It’s coming for me,
To swallow me whole
And spit out my bones.
It’s coming for me,
It’s coming for me!
Where are you Aphrodite?
Where once there were memories
Now lay enemies in the dark,
In which fear lives to haunt,
And love sits in taunt,
My innocent imploded heart
Which lay in tatters on the rug
Of ugly green,
Beside my father’s rocking chair,
Still rocking on it’s own,
Eerily as if he’d just gotten up.
Maybe a ghost of what was,
Doing what it does
And as it’s always done.
Oh Aphrodite,
After ages and eons
You’ve arrived too late,
With too little to say,
My fear has eaten,
And now I live alone,
As bare bones with no hope,
As a skeleton of stone.